Empty

It's not what i wanted. How the fuck did it get like this. You think it's going one way and then you end up in Canada. Again.

If only one day i can have everything i wanted and do the things that i saw myself doing and be with the person i saw myself being with...( when i'm 40) It is that day (today) and nothing is the way i thought it would be. What is up with that? Like a wise friend once told me, chase the things that you think would bring fun into your life cause life is short. Damn right it is. How did we get to this point? Where did the good days go? Sitting at home on a Friday night, drinking a bottle of wine just to feel like you are having fun (fuck me...). The day will come when one bottle becomes two, then start thinking what you are gonna tell your wife just to get out (or maybe even away) and go have some fun. Is that the future? Why do we get so old so soon? Ha ha, yeah poor old guy, fuck you buddy, you'll get there. Sooner than you think...

My day has come. It is upon me. Fuck my life. Don't get me wrong, it is way easy to get out of this, but do i really want to? I know that i'm starting to be the family man, but somewhere in me there is this person that says, just one more party, one more line, one more trip, one more holly fuck where are we and how did we get here? But yet, those joys of having a kid and a normal life sounds so good. The love of your life is also a bonus, cause when, if ever, would you find that again? I Hate being so fucking selfish. Pull it together boy. So, brinning me back to what i wanted to say, im happy. O so happy in life. Medicate, medicate, medicate.

Hold on, we are almost there. No point in stopping the car now...